the lies we tell ourselves

THE JOY THIEF

“I’m not good enough,” “I’m a failure,” “I’ll just quit anyway, why try?” Some common lies we tell ourselves. Don’t let these excuses become a thief of your joy. Our thoughts turn into reality. Chose wisely. 

In the #MindsetReset video with Mel, she knocked my inner critic out into the light. This one is solid if you haven’t listened to it yet.

If your cramped for time or need a quick refresher, around minute 10 of 20 they rock this question of doubt we tell ourselves.

“If you could change it all, would you? Would you trade the great memories with your loved ones for the unrealistic goal you’ve been setting yourself up for?

Why do we place this “limiting belief” on ourselves?” The lies we tell ourselves is actually our greatest source of suffering in this life. Lies of our value, our worth, our destiny. Our future can be bright as the truths we tell ourselves, or it can be dark as the the lies or untruthful thoughts we believe. 

DITCH THE COMPARISONS

The key to this video that they totally crushed was Mel interviewing her husband, Chris.

A male that we tend to hold up on a high pedestal. The ones in our relationships that have it all together, have all the confidence and achieve it all and we are… just there, right? 

NO! They are full of the same crap lies WE tell ourselves! They just must cover it better or not admit any of it to save face.

You can change your default setting, aka “RESET” not that it’s a new year, EVERY MORNING YOU GET A RESET. Heck, every second you breathe you can change it NOW.

Kinda goes with being healthier, you don’t have to lie to yourself and say, “Oh, I’ll get back on track tomorrow or Monday or next week.”

BS, call yourself out and say, “RIGHT NOW I’m going to start.” You are awesome enough that you should treat yourself to that. Ditch the comparisons. You are worthy. You are enough. Sometimes it’s easy to forget how amazing you are. Change can be hard and somewhat painful, you can’t expect results to come from magic. 

 

PERFECTLY IMPERFECT

Slow down and listen to how mean you are to yourself. There are some mean little voices in the back of your mind that speak some of your inner fears. 

When you hear yourself saying these things STOP and ASK what excuses you are telling yourself?

“I’m lazy” then dig deeper to uncover you limiting belief, “I’m afraid I won’t stick with it”

For example, I’ll text my fav gal pals several weeks ahead of time to commit to a couple’s dinner, lunch or nails pre-vacation. Whatever it is, that way I get it on the calendar to be intentional with those that matter the most. So I don’t bail on them. So I don’t reflect and have that ugly “regret” or “FOMO = fear of missing out”.

{Confession: I have a severe fear of missing out. Likely growing up in a split home that I felt I was “always” missing something with the other parent or siblings.

Because when I’d get back together with the other half, they’d share all the glorious activities they did. In my mind, I was only focusing on what I “missed” rather than celebrating what I did.

I tortured myself. No one did this to me. I let go of control and let that eat away at me. I may have had a better time, but I was beating myself up and forgetting that just because someone else’s story sounded better than what I was telling myself in my head.}

 

DANGER OF DENIAL 

Someone recently told me, “Wow you’ve changed.” Well, that is one way to look at it, or maybe I am simply in the process of discovering who I am all along. Everyone needs a sense of purpose in life without denying the “real” you. Getting to know the true you will help you succeed in life and allow you to get what you want out of life. Remember I said what YOU want out of life. Not what others want or expect from you, but more about what makes you come alive. It’s not too late to redefine who you are, and to challenge all those lies we’ve always told ourselves. Don’t back down. Stay firm through the truth and bravery. This is your life. 

I know I’m just a small-town Iowa girl but the tragic news of Kobe Bryant, his daughter Gigi and 7 other individuals shook me to the core a little. Imagine if those passengers on that plane knew that January 26, 2020, was going to be their last day on Earth. I wonder if they would have done certain things differently with their life. We are given one body, one vessel that is with us for our entire lives. We need to take care of it and perform our best. Stop denying and start discovering your true self, achieve those long lost dreams, whatever pain you feel try to heal it, embrace courage and love. Be a Kobe Bryant. 

 

PERSONAL FREEDOM

It’s ok to talk back to ourselves when we start getting sassy with all the lies we have been telling ourselves. You can either sit back and do nothing and wonder what your life could have been, or you can get busy with doing things you love and make things happen. By making it a habit, over time our mind will change and we will be living in truth and honesty instead of all the lies. Your world will become lighter, happier and more joyous because the dark prison walls of self-destruction and self-criticism will be gone. The future is bright. Take control! Good intentions aren’t enough. Sticking to your plan is hard work, and humans like us tend to be notoriously poor at following through with our plans. 

Now I’m aware to change what I don’t like. I’m in control of my destination or fate. I’m in control to stop myself from believing my lies.

Are you? Or are you robbing yourself of your happiness?

Take control of your life, write your own story the way you want it. Your mind will slowly follow, letting that all play out.

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